A Little Lighter in Stars Hallow


 I think sometimes your heart knows exactly what you need before your brain catches up, and somehow has the power to pull you in the direction you need to go.


There’s that quieter realization that nothing has to be fixed for things to be exactly what is needed.


So what was it about this weekend that was exactly what my heart needed?


It was the morning strolling through town with Luke’s coffee, having those Lorelai and crew style talks, spending time at the bookstore soaking in the book world, and of course the opening song sung with thousands while being welcomed to town by Emily and Luke.


I found myself slipping away into thought as I sat and soaked in the feelings, people, and experiences around me. For a moment, I found myself recognizing that there wasn’t this sense of having to earn my place within the group. That I just got to be there and show up as I am without worrying about if I was hitting some invisible marker. Don’t get me wrong, the old habit of feeling like a burden still found its way in. But then it would quietly be met with the feeling of being seen. With the feeling that I wasn’t just an addition. With the feeling that I held some importance in the group.


As I look back at the weekend, there were moments that meant more to me than people probably realized. Being included in pictures fills something in me more than people will ever know. Laughing hard. Being included. Just being there.


I wish I could bottle the feelings I had in Stars Hollow, bring them home, and sprinkle them throughout my days.


When pulling away from the magical world of Stars Hollow, I felt the weight start to seep in again. The thoughts growing heavier, the overthinking going faster, and the want to withdraw.


But what I keep reminding myself is that even though those things filter back in, they don’t cancel any of the happiness I felt. They don’t take away from the feeling of being connected.


What if this weekend wasn’t supposed to fix anything? What if it was supposed to remind me that I do have people?


Life has been heavy lately, and Stars Hollow was filled with things that made my heart and mind feel a bit lighter.


And maybe lately, a little lighter is exactly what my heart has been asking for.

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